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Tuesday, May 16, 2023
The theme of this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week is ANXIETY.
Divorce affects almost every part of your life. Uncertainty about the future will cause you to worry. It is, therefore, natural, and indeed likely, that while going through a divorce you will suffer from anxiety, to varying degrees.
Some of the most common worries include;
- Where will I live ?
- Will I be financially worse off ?
- Will my children be emotionally harmed ?
- Will I still see my children ?
- How much will my divorce cost ?
- Will people judge me or blame me ?
- Will I be single forever ?
In the beginning theses worries can be overwhelming. Put simply, the only way through is out.
Tips for helping to reduce your anxiety during a divorce
1. Make a Plan
Decide where you want to get to. This is best discussed with your solicitor so that your plans are both realistic and so that you do not set the bar too low.
Then make a plan on how you are going to get there. Break this down into small manageable tasks. It will provide a focus, help you see the bigger picture and also give you small senses of accomplishment as you work through your plan.
2. Keep a Diary
A diary will help you to keep track of your feelings. You will hopefully notice how less anxious you are becoming as your divorce progresses.
A diary is also helpful to identity triggers of anxiety. You can then find ways to resolve these. If you are triggered by receiving an email from your ex’s solicitor, arrange for them to be sent to a friend. If you are anxious about having enough money to pay the bills, speak to your solicitor, your ex may be required to pay maintenance for you whilst the divorce is ongoing.
3. Build a support network
Don’t try to get through your divorce alone. Talk to family and friends and tell them that you are not ok. They can help distract and support you through your most anxious times. Have a friend on standby for when your anxiety is at its worse, which is often late at night.
Join an online divorce support group, other members are usually available 24/7 to chat and emphasise with you and share your worries.
4. Consider Professional Support
A counsellor or psychologist can help you work through your anxiety and to develop different coping strategies.
A good family solicitor will make the process as straightforward and worry free as possible. A solicitor should not add to your anxiety. They should respond to any questions promptly and provide you with regular updates.
If you have any questions or concerns relating to any of the issues raised in this blog please do not hesitate to contact the Family Team at Samuel Phillips Law by emailing family_team@samuelphillips.co.uk or calling 0191 232 8451.
Written by Sarah Ward, Partner – Divorce and Family
Sarah “Best divorce lawyer in the North” and “Wonder Woman of the Divorce World”, joined Samuel Phillips Law in 2019.
